Newsletter Archive

MAY 2010

Dangers of DIstorted Thinking

Your boss doesn't respond to one of your emails and you conclude that he is angry with you. A colleague forgets to return a manual that she borrowed and you take it as a sign that she is selfish. After being turned down for one job you are convinced that no one will hire you and stop looking for work.

These are all examples of cognitive distortion, which is a habitual pattern of negative thinking that results in misreading people and situations. The thoughts associated with cognitive distortion are not only negative, they are automatic. Something happens, you immediately form an idea about it, and don't stop to consider whether your conclusion makes sense or not. Cognitive distortions are common among the individuals I coach and can be a source of much anxiety, fear and confusion.

The concept of cognitive distortion was introduced by Dr. David Burns, who authored a classic 1980 book on the subject titled, Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy. A pioneer in the field of cognitive therapy, Burns demonstrated that people can lessen anxiety, depression and other harmful emotions by changing the way they think about events in their lives.

Cognitive distortion is certainly not unique to individuals with Asperger's Syndrome and Nonverbal Learning Disorder (NLD). However, when the negative thought patterns are coupled with the communication problems inherent in Asperger's and NLD, there can be significant misunderstandings at work and in one's personal life.

Common patterns that I see in my coaching practice are misattributing the intentions or motives of others; black & white thinking with no room for compromise or change; and magnifying the severity of a situation. One of the big clues that a person's perceptions are distorted is the lack of evidence supporting them.

Burns described 10 common patterns of distorted thinking, which are listed below. As you read through them, see if you recognize any of the patterns in your thinking.

1. All-or-nothing thinking: seeing people and situations in absolute terms - good or bad, right or wrong, smart or stupid - and having difficulty seeing things in shades of gray.

2. Catastrophizing: the tendency to exaggerate the potential for negative outcomes. For example, your boss asks you to re-do part of an assignment, and you decide that he's getting ready to fire you.

3. "Should's:" a strict set of rules about how people (including yourself) are supposed to act or do things, and exaggerated consequences if a rule is violated. Ellen, for instance, thought that colleagues should always meet deadlines or be fired.

4. Personalization: assuming that you are the reason that someone behaved in a certain way without considering other explanations. "Todd didn't say hello to me because he doesn't like me."

5. Jumping to conclusions: This happens in two ways. Mind reading is concluding that someone is reacting negatively to you without any evidence that this is true ("Dan didn't fix my computer because he wanted my projects to be late."). Fortune telling is when you anticipate that things will go wrong and treat this as an established fact.

6. Labeling: assigning negative labels to yourself or other people without having evidence to support that conclusion. "My co-workers are selfish and unsupportive because they wouldn't cover for me;" "The division head is an idiot for not giving me the promotion."

7. Filtering: paying attention only to negative information and filtering out the positive. Jill obsessed over one criticism in her performance review, ignoring the overall "exceeds expectations" rating and recommendation for a raise.

8. Disqualifying positives: insisting that positive experiences don't count. "Anyone could have gotten the award."

9. Emotional reasoning: the belief that your feelings are the truth. "I feel stupid, so I must be stupid;" "I'm worried about losing my job, so they must be ready to fire me."

10. Overgeneralization: global statements about one-time events. For example, you enter one wrong formula into Excel and believe that you're no good at spreadsheets; you get off at the wrong subway stop and believe that you cannot use public transportation.

Thought patterns can be changed. Next month in the Asperger's & NLD Career Letter we will discuss some techniques for challenging negative thoughts and replacing them with more realistic ones.

© 2010 by Barbara Bissonnette, Forward Motion Coaching